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Helaine Iris © 2004 Last Thursday was a remarkable day. My 18-year-old daughter, who is just about to graduate from her alternative high school, had to present her academic portfolio as a requirement of graduation. Her charge was to demonstrate mastery in several different learning realms to a roundtable of teachers, parents, and members of the community. Not an easy task. She prepared for weeks. She pulled together all of the work she felt best represented her senior year of learning. She also had to write a narrative about each learning realm as well as reflect in general about her high school experience. It was an amazing process to witness. She worked her tail off reviewing, synthesizing and preparing to present the past year of her growth-filled life. The day finally came. In a large, naturally lit classroom around a broad table, eight people carefully reviewed the numerous folders of my daughter’s portfolio. The air was charged with the feeling of a young woman’s rite of passage. At one point, my daughter was asked to leave the room while we discussed her personal and academic achievements of her career. According to procedure, the roundtable would determine if she passed and would graduate. I must say, as the proud mother, she came through with flying colors. The work she presented more than met the requirements. The team was extremely impressed and awed by the well roundedness and depth of my daughter and her work. She was lavished with praise and validation. I watched her soak in all the attention like a sponge, almost to the point of discomfort. At our celebratory dinner afterwards, our family was debriefing and reflecting on what we had all just experienced. At one point, in the joyfully, animated conversation, my daughter began to wonder if a fellow classmate, also a successful student, would experience the same degree of affirmation that she was feeling. When we asked her to elaborate, she stated simply that what was so remarkable about her experience at the roundtable was that we were all praising her for WHO she was as a person, not just for what she’s accomplished. She wondered out loud if her friend’s parents would put the emphasis on her friend’s achievements rather than for who she was as a person. In that moment, my husband and I looked at each other and smiled. We realized as parents, we had done our job. She was able to distinguish this very profound awareness that, in my opinion, escapes most people. Who you ARE in life is equally as important as what you DO. Who are YOU? Do you know? Do you value who you are as a person in the world as much as you value your accomplishments? Admittedly, we live in a culture where we are mostly defined by what we do rather than who we are. Both are important but I would presume that most of us are out of balance in the doing department. Here’s an invitation to ponder the following questions and spend some time remembering or cultivating who you ARE. 1. When you think of yourself, what do you primarily identify with - your sense of being or what you do? 2. Can you identify your values? What’s most important to you beyond the “shoulds” of life? Truth, integrity, beauty, love? 3. If you were to die tomorrow, what would people remember about you? How much money you made or what you stood for? 4. How well do you love yourself? What do you need to take care of so when you look at yourself in the mirror you feel good about you (and I don’t just mean physically)? I give thanks to my wise daughter for reminding me of this very powerful life distinction. What a gift it is to be a part of raising a human being who finds value and meaning in herself. It’s YOUR life…imagine the possibilities!
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Advice Home Business Technology Online Advertising Motivational Internet Marketing SEO Help Online Games Science Articles Happiness More Articles:1. Ten Tips For Setting (and Keeping) Life Changing Resolutions Ten Tips For Setting (And Keeping) Life Changing ResolutionsIt’s time for that annual ritual of making (and breaking) our New Year’s resolutions. There is something about the idea of being able to start over that motivates us to pause (at least briefly) and reflect on our lives as they are, as well as how we would like them to be. Yet how many times have you thought back to last year’s goals and found that many or most of them were abandoned or j… 2. Mentors Around Every Corner Do you have a library card? At this point you're probably asking yourself how in the world this is possibly going to translate into a commentary on self-improvement. Bear with me on this because it's going to fit together I assure you.Sadly, if you're like most folks you don't have one. Not only that, you might not even remember the last time you took advantage of these incredible repositories of knowledge. In actuality the word incredible is a g… 3. PUT YOURSELF ON YOUR LIST If I asked you to describe yourself, what would be the firstfive things that come to mind? Are they positive things? Are atleast three out of five positive? I hope so. If not, though, itis good information. It indicates a need for you to makeself-appreciation and self-respect a higher priority.You've all heard the phrase, 'Be your own best friend'. Howwould you describe your best friend? It is unlikely that youwould have a list of negatives, isn'… 4. How Costly Is Laser Hair Removal? The cost of Laser hair removal is of less importance to the hundreds of men and women who have benefited from this technique. Laser hair removal may be more expensive than other hair removal methods such as plucking, waxing or shaving. However, it is a longer-lasting treatment and saves you valuable dollars in the future. Laser hair removal is a simple and clean procedure for a permanent solution from the problem of unwanted hair. The cost… |