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'I just don't understand men. Last night I was sitting at the kitchen table, when my husband wandered by with a glass in his hand. 'I asked him, 'Is that a triple-coconut-cream-of-pickle-juice spritzer with a dash of chili powder you're drinking?' He says, 'Sure. What else?' It looked so yummy, that I just had to have a taste. 'Put it down here on the table for me, please,' I asked. 'Want to know what he did next? He emptied his glass on the table. Right there in front of me. It went flowing all over me and all over the chair and all over the floor. Yeach! What a mess. What on earth was he thinking?' Signed, Soaking Lady, 42 Bouncing Canyon Lane I get strange letters all the time. Everybody wants to be happy, and they all think The Happy Guy can solve their problems. Here's another letter I received just today: 'Hey Happy Guy, 'Can you explain women to me? You just can't please 'em. 'Take last night for example. There I was minding my own business, sipping on a juicy glass of triple-coconut-cream-of-pickle-juice spritzer with a dash of chili powder, when my wife asks me to pour it on the table. I mean, is that a crazy request or what? 'But wait. It gets worse. Even though it means sacrificing the triple-coconut-cream-of-pickle-juice spritzer with a dash of chili powder I love so much, I pour it on the table for her. So what does she do? She blows up. She shouts and screams and yells all sorts of four letter words ... each with at least ten letters. 'Can you help me understand women?.' Signed, Thirsty Man, 42 Bouncing Canyon Lane Sa-ay. These two letters are from the same address. Go figure. After a while, a man discovers that he and his wife do not even speak the same language. Sure, we both call it 'English', but we each use different dictionaries. Consider the word 'fine'. When a woman uses the word 'fine', a man knows he has just lost an argument. 'Fine' is a woman's way of saying, 'OK, you win the argument, but you only win because I let you, and I am still right, so take your duct tape and put it somewhere useful ... like across your mouth!' To a man, 'fine' means something completely different. It means that something is fine. It is good. It is as it should be. Some men, such as yours truly, use 'fine' as a response when a woman asks, 'How do I look in this new dress I bought?' Men like that ought to just hop in front of a moving train to save themselves a lifetime of slow, painful torture. When a man says 'fine' to a woman, it won't be long before that woman says 'fine' to him. Better get out your duct tape. So my answer to Soaking Lady is this: 'If you don't like triple-coconut-cream-of-pickle-juice spritzer with a dash of chili all over the table and the chair and the floor, just ask your husband to wipe it up. Anyone loving enough to pour such an obviously tasty treat on the table at your request, will just as lovingly lap it up.' And my answer to Thirsty Man is this: 'No, I can't.' Every relationship works best when we use words the listener will understand as we mean them to be understood. For instance, if a man says 'fine' and a woman hears 'yuck!', just don't use the word 'fine'. Or, do what I do. Keep plenty of extra duct tape for a very rainy day.
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Advice Home Business Technology Online Advertising Motivational Internet Marketing SEO Help Online Games Science Articles Happiness More Articles:1. Are you ready to make a Strong Finish? Talk about a strong finish! In their inspiring story of perserverance which ultimately led to great success and victory, the Detroit Shock won their first ever WNBA (Women's National Basketball Association) championship title. USA Today told of their 'worst-to-first odyssey' where the team, after winning only nine games in 2002, they finished 2003 with a league-best record and championship title. What was their formula for success? 'They did not … 2. 10 Tips for More Effective Time Management If you're going to take control of YOUR life and make itgreat, you'll need to start by taking control of your time.Time management is foundational to succeeding in any areaof life. In the words of 'the father of management theory'Peter Drucker, 'until we can manage TIME, we can managenothing else.'An entire industry has been born out of the need to bettermanage our time. You can buy leather bound planners, fancysoftware packages, books, tapes and… 3. Are You Working Too Much or Too Little? Are you one of those people who get into something and just works day and night on it? Or are you one of those minimalists who didn’t start papers in school until the night before they were due? You know scraping by doing the bare minimum. That was me in school, but I am getting off topic here. You may be one of those people that will work like a maniac if it is something they really love, but will drag their feet if it is something very boring a… 4. Every calling is great when greatly pursued Living on purpose. It's a growing, evolving process.It takes focus, clarity and regular reflection. Here'sone story about a client's evolution and effort to stayon purpose.Paul is doing some incredible things. His businessbottom line is up and stronger than ever. There are newopportunities on the horizon allowing him to live hisdream and in many ways he's on the leading edge in hisindustry.I met Paul four years ago. He was referred to me when Iwa… |