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we're often reluctant to let go of our partners completely. We've shared so much of our lives with our partner, it seems almost callous to simply cut them out of our lives--especially if we're ending the relationship on good terms. It's natural that we want to hold onto the loving and supportive part of the romantic relationship, and simply let go of the parts that aren't serving us. This is entirely possible: we can remain friends with our former lovers. We both need to want to build a friendship, however. If we choose to stay friends with a former romantic partner, we will have to establish new boundaries and expectations in the relationship. The old checklists are no longer appropriate, and it may take some time to make a successful transition to the new relationship. It's best, in fact, if we do not spend any time together once we've officially ended the romantic relationship. A clean break is essential. We need time to separate our life from our partner's. We need to reestablish our own boundaries and our own identity. And we need to spend a little time mourning the death of the romantic relationship. It takes time for the emotional connections to adjust, and it takes time for us to gain perspective on the entire relationship. Once we're ready to spend time with our partner again, we must recognize that any friendship that we build is a new relationship. It is not an extension or continuation of our romantic relationship. We will need to start slowly, and to build up a new level of trust. It will take some time to make sure we're using the appropriate checklists. We can't expect the same kind of support or commitment in a friendship as we did in a romantic relationship. By the same token, we may find that we could tolerate certain behavior from a lover, but that we won't accept it from a friend. In many ways, friendships are far more demanding than romantic relationships. We look for a higher level of shared interests and compatibility with our friends than we do with our romantic partners. We may discover that our former lovers don't make the cut as friends--and there's nothing wrong with that. We have a much easier time letting friends drift out of our lives than we do with letting go of romantic partners.
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Advice Home Business Technology Online Advertising Motivational Internet Marketing SEO Help Online Games Science Articles Happiness More Articles:1. Second Thoughts? Think Again! Life is perfect. If you have read these articles long enough, you have seen this written in several different forms and ways. There is even a series on it in one of my ebooks. Life is perfect is a way of living for me. If I understand that I have the ability to create my life by the actions I take, then I understand that both the life I live today and the life I will live tomorrow is perfect in that sense.Except when it is not. Last week we had t… 2. How to Create Your Own Blog Using Blogger It takes only a few minutes and is easy to setup your own weblog using the Blogger weblog system. By completing only three simple steps, creating an account, naming your blog and choosing a template, you too can join the thousands of people now blogging on the web. Here's a detailed step-by-step guide to help to get you started using Blogger 1.Go to Blogger.com and click on the arrow that says “Create Your Blog Now.” You'll be asked to create a u… 3. Time for Change ... When your basic systems no longer work for you I've heard many clients and friends discuss how they just can't seem to movebeyond their current situations in life. They can't find a better job, makemore money, find happiness in relationships, or find fulfillment. Thequestion I usually ask is, 'What is your idea of the perfect, fulfillingsituation?' They usually sputter a few ideas then stop and realize thatthey truly don't know what it is that would bring them fulfillment.As we grow and chang… 4. Family Album In The Digital Age Back then it was simple - you take the picture, you print it and put it in your family album. But now you have a digital camera. So do your cousins, uncles, aunts and granpa Joe. What are you going to do with thousands of digital photos to pass them onto the future generations? Read our advice.What you need is a digital photo album. Here are some good ones so you know what to start with.InAlbumInAlbum is a fun and easy to use software to turn you… |