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singles. These can range from an event that yields several nice interactions and at least one offer to get together for a date, to going home feeling frustrated and convinced you are destined to be a dating failure. If you had made a note of your mood, your general attitude, your level of comfort, (and other related factors) after each experience, you would have some very useful information. For the attributes you carry along with you to these social gatherings will have a great impact on the outcome of each. The following are tips for helping you to present the best you to others. As you read each, do a quick inventory of how you rate in that area. It's always helpful to ask friends to weigh in with their observations. The more information, the better. 1. Present yourself as confident and in possession of a healthy self-esteem. In general, people are attracted to those who appear confident and who feel good about themselves. Certainly, this is a turn-on for you as well. If you feel desirable and sexy, it makes sense that others will too. If low self-esteem is a problem for you, this should be the first area you work on in yourself. It is not necessary to have over the top confidence, just a sense that you are someone that has a lot of positives to offer others. Do some reading, take a class that teaches assertiveness and/or practice daily affirmations. Remember also that when you treat yourself with respect and adhere to healthy boundaries with others, you will foster a healthy sense of self. 2.Be Yourself NEVER try to be someone you are not. Not only do you come across as insincere, you also will present as uncomfortable and make others feel this way right along with you. Trying to be cool, aggressive, (etc.), generally just makes you awkward and unapproachable. Relax, be natural, be the you that your friends and others who know and like you, see and appreciate. Think back to the times you have witnessed someone 'acting' in a social situation, and the general reaction of those around them. Then think about the people you know who are good at meeting others. These are the people who present their true (best) side. 3. Smile and Show Enthusiasm Certainly you have encountered strangers who were sullen and appeared negative and unapproachable. A smile can change all that. Have an open and inviting expression. Make good eye contact. People are DRAWN to others like this. Let that attractive stranger know you are open to meeting them and happy to be there. If they have an interest back, this will pave the way for a first interaction. If you don't feel like smiling it may be a good idea to sit this one out at home with a movie or a good book or a low-key get together with a good friend. 4. Present Your Best Appearance Always make your best effort in your grooming and choice of clothing. Attractive is just that. It's not about having beautiful features or a fantastic body. It's all about presenting what you have in the best light possible. This also includes presenting an attractive personality. Be friendly, not pushy. Be open, not indiscreet. Have opinions, don't be a know-it-all. Always remember to consider others' feelings and needs. These interactions are not just about you. 5. Have Some Good Openings Lines Available Hint: Natural conversation is best. Some possible ones to consider: *Do you know so and so? *I noticed you were enjoying the music a lot, isn't this a great band? *Your drink looks good- what is it? *I noticed you standing here alone and thought you may want some company. Of course, the direct approach is ok too. *Hi, I'm so and so, what is your name? Remember that there are no rules anymore about who goes first. If you see someone who interests you, go for it. Just remember that they may not return your feelings. Then you move away gracefully, look around for someone else that attracts you, and make an overture towards them. Also remember that rejection is part of the process. If you let the fear keep you from taking that first step, you will greatly lessen your chances of meeting and connecting with compatible singles. Toni coleman Helping Singles Find Lasting Love www.consum-mate.com Toni@consum-mate.com
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Advice Home Business Technology Online Advertising Motivational Internet Marketing SEO Help Online Games Science Articles Happiness More Articles:1. Top Ten Reasons To Have A Balanced Life The Top 10 Reasons to Have a Balanced Life1. Balance is discipline. Balance encourages us to look at all areas of our life.Discipline comes when we consistently reflect on those areas and makethe proper adjustments.2. Balance prevents obsession. At times we may focus too heavily on one area that needsattention. Then other areas suffer because we're obsessing. If westrive for balance by looking at the big picture - it's harder toobsess.3. Balance … 2. e-Matchmaking: Can a Computer Find Love For You? I logged on to a dating site the other day and was greeted by a large, flashing message. It promised that if I took the time to answer a series of questions that they would find a 'perfect match' for me. Imagine that? All the work and worry of being single - gone! We truly have evolved! Not only can computer programs manage the entire traffic system of a city and make chess grandmasters cry, but now they can lead my perfect match right to my door… 3. Emotional Intelligence vs. Cognitive Intelligence DEFINITIONSEmotional Intelligence - Understanding your own emotions and those of others, and being able to use this information to bring about the best outcome for all concerned. Knowing where emotions come from and being able to manage your own and those of others. Knowing what emotions mean and what information they are providing. Being able to work well with others as well as alone. Being able to combine cognitive knowledge with emotional know… 4. Try , or Try not... Try not. Do, or do not. There is no try.There is definitely a try, even if it doesn't lead to a do. And this separates winners from losers more surely than anything else. Trying does not, in and of itself, lead to success, of course. Depending on the goal, there are many ways to fail. But not trying surely leads to failure.I was thinking about John Stockton, the recently retired Utah Jazz basketball player who typified 'trying'. He had a lot of t… |