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The recent trend in Internet Dating has been the use of a 'computer personality test' of some sort. Websites claim that these tests, usually developed by a 'top psychologist', have the ability to understand you and your needs through a series of questions. Confused? Lost in love? Problems communicating? Don't worry, the Online Dating Hal 5000 can figure you out! In fact, when you're done, this computer program will know your needs and desires better than you do. Remember the Broadway play “Fiddler on The Roof”? You might not, it was the first Broadway play I went to when I was seven. A song that always stuck in my head for some reason was “matchmaker, matchmaker, make me a match…” The song starts as a plea to the matchmaker to bring true love straight to the altar; someone beautiful, rich, intelligent, and perfect. But by the end of the song, the singer realizes that the Matchmaker might not be up to the task. She decides that “playing with matches, a girl can get burned”. So, do these tests really work? Personality tests have a long history. Really, really smart guys with names like Freud, Maslov, Fromm, and Jung developed respected psychological theories, and these theories are used as the basis for all types of tests. “The Big Five” theory suggests that there are five dimensions of personality: openness to experience, conscientiousness, extraversion, agreeableness, and neuroticism. Some popular personality tests use this as a foundation. Others go the “Big Three” route, which does away with the “openness” and “agreeableness” dimensions - mostly because it’s easier to remember. I joke a little about these theories, but the truth is that they’ve survived the test of time and there is a ton of scientific research behind them. The real question is if these tests can be effective in applying a theory to the complexity of a human being. Add to this the additional layer of meshing your answers with another, equally complex person. That’s a tall order. People have impulsive behavior that simply can’t be measured when they’re sitting, relaxed and introspective, taking one of these tests. Often our answers reflect our perfect (or hopeful) idea of ourselves. Even if we are trying our best to be honest, our impulsive behavior in real-life situations can be far different than we’d expect. Another wildcard is attraction. We can meet someone who’s empirically good-looking, has a similar background, is kind and successful – and yet we’re not attracted. Often we can’t explain why we like another person. It may be how they make us laugh, a crooked smile – even how they smell! Sometimes little things that are immeasurable on their own can collectively make us attracted. Human beings and our emotions and desires are far too complex, and a computer program can’t solve the riddles of our romantic lives. As Jung put it, “the meeting of two personalities is like the contact of two chemical substances; if there is a reaction both are transformed”. It sounds good, but even Jung was hedging his bet when it comes to love. What will cause two individuals to react to each other? Even the developers of the study of personality would not presume that a series of questions could predict romance. If you rely solely on matchmaking services, you are missing the entire beauty of online dating. The beauty is opportunity. Online dating offers you an almost limitless opportunity to meet and date new people. It gives you the time and space to find what best suits you. Going to a quality dating site that isn’t trying to sell you fantasy of finding your match for you will mean you will have a pool of millions of singles to meet. Treat matchmaking options as just another fun way to explore. It can serve as an ice breaker to start a conversation, but don’t expect them to be the answer to finding your perfect match. Keep all options open and explore possibilities. As a unique individual, only can you know what works for you. You need to develop skills to communicate and meet people. Developing both online and offline dating skills is the best way to find the right relationship. Next time you’re brushing your teeth, take a look in the mirror. See that amazing person? That’s your matchmaker with a mouthful of toothpaste. Take charge of your life and get into action! Enjoy dating and enjoy the process of discovery. Your experiences, both good and not-so-good, are essential to finding the right person for you.
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Advice Home Business Technology Online Advertising Motivational Internet Marketing SEO Help Online Games Science Articles Happiness More Articles:1. Second Thoughts? Think Again! Life is perfect. If you have read these articles long enough, you have seen this written in several different forms and ways. There is even a series on it in one of my ebooks. Life is perfect is a way of living for me. If I understand that I have the ability to create my life by the actions I take, then I understand that both the life I live today and the life I will live tomorrow is perfect in that sense.Except when it is not. Last week we had t… 2. Free- Secrets Proven Facts On MAKING HUGE PROFITS ON EBAY Free- Secrets Proven Facts On MAKING HUGE PROFITS ON EBAY 'we all know that you wound definitely like to have a source of income aside from my regular paying job'. I am quite sure the answer is most definitely yes how often in your mind?you have mentioned to yourself I wonder how do they do it makes big money on the Internet. you are in good company. Millions of people all over the world employ considerable measures to finding extra jobs that w… 3. Credit Cards - The Inventor Of Debt Consolidation Companies Like with everything good comes something so overly abused, that turns bad. Credit Cards were invented to help others get by without using cash and being able to purchase goods when you can't find an ATM machine to get money from. But, that all changed, because it made things too easy, like spoiled kids we ran out and just bought everything we wanted and what we didn't even want. Over time everyone was buying stuff from 5 or more cards. The prob… 4. 27 Characteristics of loving men Every woman dreams of meeting that special man that knows how to fulfill her heart's romantic desires. Speaking of that special someone; is your special someone a lover or just an average Joe? No pun intended if your guy’s name is Joe. This article will outline the 27 characteristics of a loving man. If your man is one of them, then you must do all that you can to make sure he does not slip through your fingers. However, if he falls in the avera… |