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express your feelings in ways that are clear and assertive? Many folks don't. For that reason, one of two things happens: they hold the anger in, and, as we all know, it sneaks out in strange and often inappropriate ways, or, they explode and scatter their unhappiness over everyone, perhaps, destroying relationships on the way! Neither of these are healthy alternatives. Anger is an arousal in the body that is triggered by frustration, fear or hurt. As that arousal escalates, your body goes into the stress response. When that arousal raises your heart rate to about 120 to 150 beats per minute, the blood from the frontal lobes of your brain, the centers of reason and logic, drains down to protect your vital organs. This is not good news. Why? Because the more angry you become, the more unable you are to think clearly! You have probably experienced that. Just when you are at your loudest, wanting to deal the death blow to prove your righteous position, you cannot think. Then, you often say one of the best things you'll ever regret! Right? When the body goes into arousal, notice. If you are talking to someone at the time, think. It is important to your well-being and the health of your relationships to answer this question: What do I want from this exchange? If a potentially volatile volley of words, accusations, and threats are likely to erupt, leave. No, this is not 'running away from a fight'. This is just informed decision-making. There is one important difference, though: tell the person that you are leaving and when you will return to discuss the issue. This is the difference between being responsible and being a 'hit-and-run' offender. Take care of the relationship. Do not abandon the other person. Simply say, 'I'm too angry now and I'm likely to say things I don't mean. I'll be back in three hours and let's discuss this then. If it is in the work setting, acknowledge your desire to work out the issue, and promise to get back to them within three hours to set a time to talk further. This is not easy, but it is effective! Why three hours or more? Simple. It takes a full ninety minutes for the blood to return to your centers of reason and logic and your heart beat to return to normal. It makes good sense to wait and it demonstrates that you care about yourself AND the relationship.
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Advice Home Business Technology Online Advertising Motivational Internet Marketing SEO Help Online Games Science Articles Happiness More Articles:1. Key to Excellent Communication: Anticipation Excellent communication. It’s what we’re all after, when the first rule of communication is to assume you’ve been misunderstood.We generally work very hard to express what we have in mind, and in giving instructions to go over each one step-by-step. We also try and listen carefully, and to repeat back what we think we’ve heard to be sure. And if we’re selling, we try an anticipate objections. But there’s one part that’s very helpful we often leav… 2. Six Items You Should Never Put in Your Resume The most common mistake made by people who attempt to put together their first resume is that they put in too much information. They want to describe everything that they have ever done from the moment of conception to the present. The resume ends up being too long, and nobody will read it. The most important piece of information that you should retain is that your resume, no matter how well it is put together, will only get a 15 to 30 second rev… 3. Two and Two Make Five This is not bad a lesson in maths, this is about gettingmore profit from your business through co-operation andteamwork. Do this successfully and you'll create somethingwhere the value of the whole is greater than the sum of theparts. It's a true story that will show you exactly how tomake two and two add up to five, or more.At around 7 p.m. on May 3, 2001, I was taking my dog, Holly,she's part Rottweiller, part dog (sorry, I mean Shepherd),for h… 4. Using Wholesale Electronics to Get Organized If you're not at the top of whatever workflow chart you find yourself a part of, chances are good that you find yourself wishing your office was a little bigger. Even though technology makes our lives easier, it certainly takes up a lot of space. And with more and more gizmos and gadgets coming out each year, the wires, manuals, and add-ons can really take their toll on your already cramped space.Office space clutter is not only annoying, but it … |